Engraved on my heart forever!

Till today
I look at my phone
Expecting a call that would change my life
A call that would only allay my fears

I still wish someone would tell me it's a lie
An expensive  joke,  maybe
I won't mind at all
Let them tell me it's a prank
And no matter how fooled I am by it
I still want to be frank
I won't mind at all
Because  what we matters  to me
Is that you are right here, in this world,with me

Tears, like dry petals, fall
From eyes so burdened with sadness
One after the other they prick
My inflated balloon of hope...hope that wouldnt fail me
At least not this time
Hope that you were still here
And just a phone call  away
I would walk to you right away
Stubbornly, I refuse to accept my loss
I regret not hugging you tight
A battle I have to fight
Regret lynches  me
Launching me into a abyss
Of the reality  I have to contend with
How long has it been since  I last saw you?
'Days that could be soo  easily  counted'
I should have stolen you away
That could have been a way
Maybe that way you would have been safer
Stuck like cream in a wafer
Protected from the waves by a surfer
That could have been me-your hero

If I had a way
If only it was possible
I would  have taken quick measures
To hold you captive
Like a colonial  master would to a special slave
In a conclave.....
Till I knew you would  be safe
Much safer
All I can think of now is a time machine
I would kill to use that
No matter how unreal it seems
I badly want to retrace my steps
Pay the past day of our encounter a visit
And against all the tides
Beckoned heaven to give you another chance
So we could dance
And laugh together in our old age
Maybe your teeth would be missing
Whilst mine would have been left with about 2 incisors
I think that would have been a great plan
Because  you might need my 2 to bite hard
At the little cake we smuggled out of the kitchen

I cry!
I'm sad
I'm so distraught
The venom of this sting is overpowering
I'm without strength
Everything is too difficult  to assimilate

LaQuaye, I'm sorry I couldn't tell you how dear your friendship is to me
I reminisce how well we told each other  about our dreams
I remember  how clearly you explained your academic  journey to me
I remember  the letters we exchanged  in school
In a split of a second
I scram
I run as fast as my legs can carry
To salvage the remains of the memories I so treasured
Before those were stolen too
The ones with you, I couldn't have measured
Life is too  strange

I'm so sorry I couldn't pray for you
I so sorry  I couldn't protect you
I'm so sorry that I didn't steal you
Away, oh away, from this snare
That entangled  you
Into a world I have no knowledge  about

Someone pinch me and tell me this is just a hoax
A dream, I can wake up from....
A lie, I would easily identify...
Although,eventually...
Oh no!
Death
Thy venom is foul
You have taken away a great soul
One I hoped to love forever


I still believe,
In the depths of my heart
By the Holy Spirit's lead
That...
You are in a happy  place.....

I will hold on to the memories
I will never flush you out of my memory.
Never!
Till we meet again...
I love you KayK
You are my dearest sister
The one God gave me..
Rest in His bosom